I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize