I didn't shave. On purpose
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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