Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
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