two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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