omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize