boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
They have beer where we have blood.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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