I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Acid is not a monday night drug
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize