Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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