Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Everything about him screamed your future.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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