i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize