Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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