If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
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