walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I lost the right to judge tonight
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
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