Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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