she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I need to align my fucking chakras
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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