I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize