I didn't shave. On purpose
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize