Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize