I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize