no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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