I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Randomize