Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize