Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize