your thong is hanging out like whoa
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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