Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(417): View more from Missouri

I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!

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(417): I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon! http://tfl.nu/qgqr

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.

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(402): Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later. http://tfl.nu/06o9

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(757): View more from Virginia

It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.

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(757): It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends. http://tfl.nu/y207

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(313): View more from Michigan

then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito

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(313): then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito http://tfl.nu/szdu

Replies (33) Good night (4776) Bad night (616) Order T-Shirt
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(807): View more from Ontario

Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?

(1-807): View more from Ontario

Just flip the mattress, it erases all

(807): View more from Ontario

Done and done

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(807): Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town? (1-807): Just flip the mattress, it erases all (807): Done and done http://tfl.nu/aezq

Replies (100) Good night (2770) Bad night (7462)
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.

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(262): He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too. http://tfl.nu/5j5p

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(502): View more from Kentucky

Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.

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(502): Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this. http://tfl.nu/29p7

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.

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(919): Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music. http://tfl.nu/oyb0

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(704): View more from North Carolina

help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up

(919): View more from North Carolina

which one looks the most like her?

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(704): help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up (919): which one looks the most like her? http://tfl.nu/a8tn

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs

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(724): Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs http://tfl.nu/vayg

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?

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(832): I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went? http://tfl.nu/hldx

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(850): View more from Florida

If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.

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(850): If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through. http://tfl.nu/odn6

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.

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(203): I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe. http://tfl.nu/ze7a

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(616): View more from Michigan

Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.

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(616): Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me. http://tfl.nu/rp8b

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(757): View more from Virginia

She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.

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(757): She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night. http://tfl.nu/eco5

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