Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize