How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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