I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
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I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
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I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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