We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
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Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
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Blow job season was short but glorious.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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