Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize