When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
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