i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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