one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
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UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
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That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I'm always down for nudity.
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