At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
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