My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deserve to be covered in dicks
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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