Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
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I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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