i'm lost and i look like a hooker
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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