How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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