She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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