Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize