she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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