first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize