never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
last night I used snow as a chaser
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