glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
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