Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize