To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize