Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
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