I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
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