I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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