how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize